After Willow was born I was given several books. One of the books I read was called Gifts. It was a series of reflections from many mothers on how children with Down Syndrome enrich their lives. The other day I picked the book back up and came across this mother's reflection of her child and thought it so closely described my exact feelings for Willow. She writes, He is a daily reminder to me of Paul's words, "Be not forgetful to entertain strangers; for thereby some have entertained angels unaware"(Hebrews 13:1b2). She says, I lived most of my life as a person with limited capacity. But God gave me an angel to entertain to broaden my perspective and enlarge my heart. Through Jonny, He showed me how little He cares about our intelligence and physical appearance, how much more He cares about the things we "normal" people will never be able to measure. Looking back, I know that it must have been me God saw as disabled. But where I was blind, I now can see. Barbara Curtis wrote these very profound words and these words sum up my own thoughts and feelings over the last year. I often mention the change in me this year as a result of Willow's life. This passage is the essence of that change. My perspective has broadened and deepened, the pettiness of life has no meaning or value any more. Fearless, I have become. Maturity, I now have. Strength, I found. Intelligence and physical appearance can be here today and gone tomorrow, so tiny in the grand scheme of life. So my eyes are fixed on a higher, deeper calling. May I teach my three little ones the importance of living life with purpose and meaning and to not live with limited capacity. May they live their life with a broadened perspective and also know how much He really does care about them.

Milestones

It is hard to believe that Christmas has come and gone and we are already well into a new year. We had a great Christmas and loved each and every memory we made with family. There is always a lot of joy and excitement around our house and even a little chaos but the Christmas season is our favorite. Every new year I like to spend time reflecting on the events of the past year. This past year and if you know Chad and I every year is filled with some "big" event! This last year's "big" event was of course the birth of Willow but, it was also a life changing year for me. As her first birthday approaches I think back to this time last year and how as I was anxiously awaiting her birth I had no idea the change I was about to experience. You see as I felt her kick and heard her heartbeat I was unaware that her life would always be different and so would mine. In the nine months I carried her God was preparing my heart for that day. This past year has been a wonderful, beautiful journey. This past year I have gained more patience, more strength and more trust than I have ever known. Through Willow I have learned to enjoy the small things. As a mom I think sometimes we get so consumed with all the expectations we have for our children. We want them to crawl, walk, talk, and do everything else early. It validates us as moms, we feel proud that our child is beating all the milestones way ahead of schedule. I know I have spent years feeling this way as I watched Gillian and Ava grow and develop. I think we should have expectations for our children and we should be proud of them, I still feel this way. But, more importantly we should teach our children that their worth is in who they are and not what they do. Willow is not crawling, walking, or talking but her life is just as valuable. Each milestone she makes is a big deal in our home; I see how much harder she has to work and all the small things that may not be a big deal to anyone else is HUGE for us. I see how happy and content she is and wish I could be more like her. This new year has brought quite a few experiences for Willow...

She now sits up like a big girl cheering for her favorite(daddy's) team!

She now wears a ponytail in her hair!

She has also discovered snow and she loves it!

I look forward to this new year all that God has in store for our family.